There is Hope when My Faith Runs Out

God has humbled me tremendously in the last few weeks, I have been pulled to me knees and to the point where I must put my trust completely in Him. I am thankful for these low, dark points because it brings me to a point where I am looking fully into the face of God. I am stripped down to my most vulnerable self and drawn to the light at the end of the tunnel. God has a way of bringing our hearts back to him at just the right time. Granted, we should always be in a constant conversation with God but it's when we are at our darkest point that God shines His brightest down on us. My aunt always said "don't forget about God even when it's sunny and life is perfect," and that is something I have failed in doing. God longs for our attention, love and desire at all times, not just when things are bad. I have really been struggling with this idea of trying to please everyone and low and behold I open my devotional and that is exactly what it talked about...God is funny like that, right? The author described herself as a vending machine, every time someone different came to her she immediately changed to be who that specific person wanted her to be. She could not be more spot on with how I've been feeling lately. For once I just want to be real, and I've been putting on a show to please everyone for too long. I mean to the point where I can no longer tell someone "no," I just keep putting myself in these miserable situations because I am "scared" of making someone mad by telling them "no." I've dug myself into this hole and these people just keep throwing the dirt in on top of me! Well, enough is enough and God says He will give us favor with people if we ask Him to do so AND put our trust in Him. I don't have to beat myself up pleasing everyone, if I just seek God first He will create these wonderful relationships FOR me. I have always been the type of person who doesn't like confrontation, I don't like to feel like someone is mad at me. It bothers me when I cannot make someone happy, or can't make someone appreciate me. Well, I guess I've found the resolution to this problem, all I have to do is ask and trust. In closing, I want to quote my devotion tonight:

" If God can make a river flow in a specific direction, surely He can change someone's heart toward us. We wear ourselves out trying to do what only God can do. "